Hey-yai people, it's been so long since updated my blog..it's been like what more than 6 months plus I think.. Well it has been 1/2 year and I would just say one thing I was and I am still freaking busy with my final year project. I just can't wait for it to end. Pass this 7 months, things weren't really great for me..so much troubles am going through with my project and I just hope I would get the result I wanted, the outcome I want to enjoy it. So am working really hard on it. Hopefully it will be a success :) Talking about it, I'm suppose to be in the mid of writing my thesis-chapter 2 ( Literature review) and seems like I have been procrastinating a lot since morning!!! but nyekkk I can do it cause am good at last minute work! LOL plus I still have time till Monday.
So talking about me on how my life is going on, its actually going on pretty well but just that you know at times when we are lonely or something like that, our mind tends to travel past and future all together..yea am in that phase now..
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(source: Grey's Anatomy)
I still cannot believe whatever that's happening right now but I'm slowly accepting the fact. You said you hated me so much during our last conversation few weeks ago, you blamed me on so many things that I treated you so badly and that I did not appreciate you and so many more..Seriously if I had the courage, if I had the heart to say things back to you I would have. I would have made you cried as well, I would have hurt you twice as much as you hurt me and am capable of that but that's not me. I let you to play the blaming game, I kept quiet cause I know it's not the truth, you know it's not the truth, you know what type of person I am. Your ego, your stupidity, your selfishness all of it over-rights my love. You said you still care about me, still thinking about me than why the fck are you not taking a proper decision? Why are you choosing this path when you clearly know that's not the path you wanted since the beginning? The game you are playing now, it sucks. I am not gonna be in the game as one of the player, not gonna sit and watch this sick stupid game of yours, don't try to make me part of this stupid game of yours. You can officially go to hell! Yeah you can.
You have no fkng rights to tell me that I should start to move on, fyi if you moved on that quickly doesn't mean I'm suppose to do so. No seriously I wonder how you could move on so fast, did I really meant that much only for you or was I just someone that you was with till you were bored or something? I don't know and I don't wish to know cause your love was not true cause even if it did, you would have at least waited for sometime before moving on, and you had the guts to tell me that I only find you after you and her happened. Now tell me if I didn't do so what kinda girlfriend was I?? You know there is so much of questions that I want to ask you, so much of things I want to tell you and I don't know when am gonna explode with this feeling in me but I guess maybe its not the time yet for me to speak to you about it or even maybe god just doesn't want me to speak to you at all. I prefer the latter one.I just hope I wont and will never see you again in my life ever, even if I did I wish that I'll have the courage to walk away with a stronger heart.
(source: Grey's Anatomy)
p/s: seems like today's post which is after 6 months I am still emo'ing about this mf love feelings! arrghhh for god sake give me a break please.. :/
-Kausy-
-The memories came rushing back like they never even left-
